Women's Personal Leadership Journey in the UAE

Before traveling to the UAE, I bought into the cultural stereotype and had a particular cultural lens that interpreted or suggested that women in the UAE are soft, dependant on men, are not considered equal to men and are dominated by men. I read that there is gender segregation, with women deferring to their husbands’ authority to sustain the social reputation of their husband in the community as head of the household. Although there were indications that the women of UAE in recent years have become business owners and great leaders, I had difficulty shaking the stereotype that the only roles played by women were to take care of the children and the home. I thought this to be the case because of the fact that this is a power distance culture where followers obey their leaders, mostly men, without question, and from media reports that gave the impression that men dominate the woman in that culture.

This notion was quickly dispelled on my first day in the UAE, when we visited a mosque. There were two people guiding us through the mosque experience and it was clear that the female guide was more confident, very knowledgeable and didn’t defer to her male counterpart. As a matter of fact, it was evident that he deferred to her and relied on her for clarification and confirmation. We were not surprised to later learn that she is a Zayed University student.

We followed very strict instructions on dress code and most importantly, the need to cover our heads. I again viewed this as another way to subdue the women. With no knowledge of how to arrange the head cover, I asked another student who happens to be from Saudi Arabia to help me with the adjustment of my head cover.

The tour guides at the Mosque explained the order of protocol of the mosque. They explained the number of times (5-6) per day the call goes out for prayer and the ablution that is necessary for each person before they enter the mosque. The ablution process is an important aspect of the visit for prayer. As I listened to and watched the demonstration of the washing process, that is the ablution, and the emphasis placed on it, one very common saying in my culture came to mind, that is, "cleanliness is next to Godliness".

The guides demonstrated the prayer typically said and led by the Imam, the male spiritual or prayer leader of the mosque, and pointed out where he stands and speaks to the members in the mosque. It was explained that women who are at home with the children typically takes time to pray at the same time the call for prayer goes out and are not necessarily missing out on praying. It was also mentioned that women who are able to come to the Mosque for prayer must always pray in a separate room to the men. The reason given for the separation of the sexes is the need to eliminate the distraction for the men, since a major part of prayer necessitates some bending.

Meeting Madam Al-Gurg turned out to be a really informative meeting as she explained to us how she became one of the most respected woman leaders in the UAE. I was surprised to hear her say that she volunteered to take over her father’s business when she realized that her brothers were reluctant to. I was also surprised that in a male dominant culture that she had the confidence she could step into her father’s footsteps. She not only stepped into her father’s footsteps, she has been able to not only maintain the companies, but also added new ones.

As I listened to her talk about her journey, I was impressed that she was able to raise her children by carefully choosing a career, a teaching job, which would allow her the flexibility she needed to work and at the same time take care of her children. She was able to do this in a culture where women were expected to stay home to take care of their children and the home. She found ways to get around the stereotype that women belong in the home.

I get the sense that her father recognized that she had lots of determination, organizational and leadership skills. I was also impressed that Madam Al-Gurg is able to effectively lead in a male dominated society and as she explained, she uses her cooperative leadership skills and acts as a friend to all employees. She clearly stated that she never try to establish herself as the boss and is not afraid to even work on the loading docks if she thought it was necessary. Madam Al-Gurg pointed out that as women, it is important to recognize your strength and making it work for you. Is a good quality to develop and she seemed to have done that in the male dominated culture that she operates in.

Madam Al-Gurg also talked about the need to have flexible work arrangements for young mothers joining the workforce in an ever changing society and she is not shy at using her voice and influence to try and effectuate the change. When she mentioned that there is talk of getting businesses to have on site childcare centers I kept thinking that the movement for change is on. I respect the fact that she invests the time in such issues and admire her involvement in the discussions with officials regarding the need for flexible work arrangements and affordable childcare with a view to eliminate some of the issues that would prevent a woman from working. She acknowledges that there is a long way to go before this becomes the norm, but at least the dialogue has started. It was interesting to note however that her daughter has chosen to be a stay at home Mom and I didn’t get the sense that Madam Al-Gurg is discouraging her from doing so. Dedicating oneself to the care of children is a natural part of the culture. However, this is a high context society where messages contain many codes or implied meanings, and sometimes it is difficult to decipher what really is being said, and so, there is always the need to read between the lines.

Listening to the entrepreneur and author of the book, “From Rage to Riches”, Mohammed Al Fahim, as he spoke about the 1950s, 1960s and 1970s when the men would leave their families for six months to one year at a time to go fishing and pearl diving, it was the women who in addition to looking after the children, made the furniture for the home, knitted the clothing needed for the family, grind flower, made baskets and manage the sale in the market place of the fish their husbands brought. Women were good managers even then and kept their family in good order while their husbands were away.